22 May 2014

The Torture Tree

Little girl neighbour was back in my garden tonight, and she began patting the leaves of one of my trees (a flowering cherry) while resting her face against it and saying, 'Ah... my lovely, lovely tree.'

'Actually it's my tree,' I had to inform her while indicating which side of the boundary the trunk penetrated into the ground, 'and I'm thinking of cutting it back a lot and reducing its height to about this...' and I raised my arm to as high as it would reach above my head.

'Noooooooo!' she screamed. 'You can't harm it! It's my lovely tree that reaches over my trampoline!'

'Oh well,' I conceded, 'If you like it as it is I'll maybe leave it alone.'

'Yes! Leave my lovely Torture Tree alone!'

'Your Torture Tree? Why do you call it that?'

'Because it hurt one of my friends when she jumped on the trampoline and fell into it.'

'And you like it for that?'

'Of course!'

'You like it for hurting one of your friends?'

'Of course!'

'That's not very friendly of you.'

'But she was annoying me, and so my lovely torture tree tortured her.'

'You're worrying me a little bit now Rachel, you really are.'

'Why? Don't worry. It won't torture you... Unless you try to cut it down.'

So... I think I'll leave it as it is.

1 comment:

Elephant's Child said...

Wise decision. When I see the words torture tree my mind leaps to Bonsai - perhaps the most tortured trees around. It seems only fair that they sometimes get vengeance. Or a distant relative does so on their behalf.