15 January 2014

The Conversation - 6

"So what happened today?"

"Well when I awakened back into this mystery of consciousness I was depressed."

"Do you have to be so damn wordy all the time?"

"Well I woke up depressed."

"So what did you do about that?"

"I stayed in bed, drifting into and out of the mystery of sleep, pondering the nature of it all and..."

"Yes, yes, yes... So you stayed in bed."

"Yes."

"And did that help?"

"No."

"So what did you do then?"

"Remained in bed, depressed."

"Until?"

"Until eventually I dragged myself into a warm bath."

"And did that help?"

"No."

"And then?"

"And then I forced myself up, and out..."

"Feeling depressed?"

"Yes, until I found something needing done, and so I started to do it, reluctantly, on the computer, at a desk."

"And?"

"And then I began to feel better, and quite cheerful, and optimistic even, as I did these things that needed to be done and talked to people and exchanged opinions and ideas about things."

"Did you get a lot done?"

"Quite a lot."

"And now?"

"I feel okay really, but I am fearful of awakening in the morning and feeling depressed."

"And if you do, what will you then do?"

"Stay in bed and be depressed, probably."

"You never learn really, do you?"

"Not really."

"You're a bit of an idiot really, aren't you?"

"Oh yes."

"And do you not have anything cheerful, or funny to say? You're almost making me depressed."

"Ah... Cheerful... Funny... Next time, perhaps."


Previous parts of the conversation can be tracked through from here

5 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

When you are ready...

Claude said...

Quoting a great poet I know:

"I'll just blunder forward
and try for the best."

Claude said...

Just read the poet's note attached to his poems. Giving him credit for my comment's quotation.

His initials are: A.M.S.

Syncopated Eyeball said...

Sometimes activity helps, I find. If not at the time, sometimes later. But sometimes it's not possible to move, is it?

Andrew MacLaren-Scott said...

The problem is persuading oneself that activity will help (as I find it almost always does, eventually), and fighting the damn conviction that even if it does help its help will be invalid because the gloom is the truth... which it may be... but I still prefer the sunny thinking even if it is delusional. Sometimes a dose of delusional positivity is necessary.